Cultural cues elude the dim-witted, and that explains my reluctance to believe that Paul McCartney had died.

Plain as the nose on Ringo Starr’s face, the album-cover picture showed Paul shoeless in his walk across Abbey Road.

All the other Beatles wore shoes.

What could it mean, the subtly planted bit of artistic symbolism?

Of course, the guy must be dead.

When I saw him in concert in subsequent years, I figured that must be some new creative statement.

Musicians, writers, artists, they’re all famous for concealing messages within their work. The rub comes when they express messages outside their aesthetic.

The “shut-up-and-sing” movement began in conservative circles during a growing discontent with Hollywood celebrities mouthing off about political issues.

Radio talker Laura Ingraham made a good deal of money selling a book with this theme, painting cause-espousing stars as God-hating, America-bashing Communists with the dual attributes of being ill-informed and hypocritical.

Entertain us, then go away, she said.

It’s hard to know what harm comes of George Clooney giving a higher profile to the horrors of Darfur, of Brad Pitt trying to help rebuild New Orleans, of Leonardo DiCaprio working to save the planet.

Would we prefer they simply sit on their large bank accounts and develop dependencies like the luminaries of yore?

Conservatives seemed far more forgiving when Charlton Heston used his celebrity to speak up for gun rights.

No one told him to shut up and play Moses.

For whatever their capacity to persuade others, stars own no storehouse of knowledge. Anyone who forms political opinions solely by listening to the occasional sermons of Madonna deserves a messed-up world.

More threatening are the messages hidden in their artistic works. Celebrities are a crafty bunch.

I realized this last week on hearing news that Andy Williams, the octogenarian crooner, believes President Obama “is following Marxist theory.”

Admit it, you didn’t see that coming.

In truth, unless you’ve been a guest at Branson’s Moon River Theater or its affiliate Moon River Grill, you probably didn’t know Andy Williams was still around, much less capable of Bolshevistic analysis.

Why would he arise from a post-limelight slumber to say such a thing? Then, it dawned on me. He doth protest too much and pulled a full-fledged “Abbey Road” to disguise his own leftist leanings.

He didn’t compose “Moon River,” but look at his signature song.

"Moon River, wider than a mile ..."

Clearly a reference to the Moskva River that runs through the heart of Moscow.

"Two drifters off to see the world."

Meant no doubt to suggest fellow travelers, those sympathetic to Communist thought.

"We’re after the same rainbow’s end ..."

A call to a Utopian world.

"Waiting ’round the bend, my huckleberry friend."

Be honest, when you hear the word “huckleberry,” you think of Joseph Stalin.

And Andy Williams, starring in all those Christmas specials, always wore red.

My gosh, this guy wants to bring Marxism to Southwest Missouri, a Kremlin to the shores of Lake Taneycomo.

Conservatives should tell him to shut up and sing.

Ken Newton’s column runs on Sunday and Tuesday.